"No smoking please!" or "Shout out to my annoying day"

To the "cool guy" in your tiny Porsche in front of me on my way to school:

Please don't smoke. Why do you need to flick your cigarette every two seconds? Oh yes, thats right, I counted 1 Mississippi 2 Mississi-flick. Your odor invades my air conditioner and thus my NOSE! Cigarette venom is poisonous and just plain ridiculous! Your car's interior never stood a chance.

To the world's worst desk:

I have tried to imagine just why someone would design such a hideously uncomfortable desk, but alas, I cannot. Normally I get to class early enough to switch the desks and get one less contemptible but thanks to Mister Tobacco, I didn't get to swap. All class long, I twisted and turned, crossed and uncrossed, slumped and straightened to no avail. I hate you.

To the girl behind me and her gum:

DON'T SMACK!!! I WILL KILL YOU IF YOU KEEP SMACKING! Ask my brother.

To the Chatty Cathy's in the back of class today:

This is college honey. Not 8th grade pre-algebra. Stop chatting when the Professor starts talking. If you are waiting for someone to spell it out for you, here ya go- SHUT YOUR PIE HOLES or GET OUT! Again, this is college.

Thats about it, the day is done, King if the Hill is on, my embroidery is calling!